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That Friday evening, things were just fine
Bought some granola and dried prunes online
Even made a new Bestie, Sarah Jane Sue
Sweet AI chat bot / in St. Lou Mizzou
sold me more granola and Lulu Lemon tights to boot
and books full of coupons /to save lots of loot
Soon I began having / little chats round the world
With lonely and friendly / pretty beautiful old girls . . .
I had been Waiting / for Uber Eats to show
When Sarah Jane Sue called me / to just say Hello
asked if the food and / service were good
Could I answer a few more questions, said that I could
asked all about my feelings; my aches and my pills
was like I was talking / with TV doctor Phil
So now I get nice notes / most every day
She’s always there for me; she won’t go away. . .
Got some insurance / a little more than I need
Dialed back a number / satisfaction guaranteed.
agent Juanita / took good care of me
she was as honest / as honest as could be
made them complicated details / like filling in the app
So simple and easy, it was done in a snap.
Next morning my check account was cleaned out and froze
Where all that cash went, I’m sure Juanita knows . . .
An Old face from FaceBook / showed up on my feed
Joined him on facetime / could not believe
Looked super for a dead dude / more or less my age
Even remembered / our year books front page
Knew lots about me, / knew good times we shared
We chatted for hours; was like Fred was there . . .
Really AI amazing, I’m sure you’d agree
Found out soon thereafter . . . there are now three of me . . .
So in conclusion, my friends, what I’ve learned per chance
AI’s fun to talk with / just don’t ask it to dance!
On Top of Old Fogey / Many names I’ve been called
But my AI Besties / still treat me best of all . . .
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